Chronic pain can be an invisible yet powerful force, one that shapes everyday activities and impacts mental well-being in profound ways. For those of us living with degenerative disc disease (DDD) and lower lumbar disc herniation, this reality is all too familiar. It’s not just the physical discomfort that we grapple with; the mental toll can be just as heavy. In this post, I want to explore my personal journey through these challenges and share some tips that have helped me cope.
Understanding Degenerative Disc Disease and Disc Herniation.
Before diving into my experience, it’s essential to understand what DDD and disc herniation entail. Degenerative disc disease is a condition that occurs when the intervertebral discs in the spine begin to deteriorate. This can lead to pain, stiffness, and reduced flexibility. I have three degenerative discs, one at the bottom on my cervical spine (lower neck), one in the middle of my thoracic spine (middle back), and then the worst one for me is the one in my lower lumbar spine (bottom back), which has herniated around seven times over the last 6 years leading to lower lumbar disc herniation and calcification, which occurs when a disc in the lower back bulges or ruptures. It can press on nearby nerves, namely the sciatic nerve, and causes debilitating, radiating pain, weakness, or numbness in the legs, not to mention back spasms.
Living with these conditions means waking up each day with a reminder of their presence. Some days are better than others, some days I can wake up and feel no pain until I start moving around, and other days I can be in pain immediately after waking up, or the pain actually WAKES me up, and that inconsistency can be incredibly frustrating.
As a woman, I feel there are societal expectations that often push us to keep going, take care of others, and manage households without breaking a sweat. But the reality of a chronic illness is that some days, you can’t meet these expectations, and that’s okay.
I am also diabetic and menopausal, and this just adds another layer of stress that I have to manage on a daily basis.
The Pain: An Ongoing Battle.
Chronic pain has a way of monopolizing your life. It seeps into every aspect of daily living, affecting not just physical activity but also simple pleasures, social interactions, and even personal achievements. For me, it can feel as though I’m tethered to a weight, one that prevents me from fully engaging in life. I don’t know when I’ll be able to go to a theme park again and get my adrenaline kicks from rollercoasters, or go on a nice holiday somewhere. I had to cancel a trip to Disneyworld with my sister last year because my health and surgery became the priority. It was deeply upsetting for me.
Simple tasks like lifting groceries, sitting for long periods, or even getting out of bed can provoke sharp, unrelenting discomfort. More than just physical pain, it creates a cycle of fear and limitation – I sometimes find myself hesitating at the idea of physical activities that I used to enjoy, afraid of triggering a flare-up.
Mental Health: The Unseen Struggles
Perhaps the most insidious aspect of living with chronic pain is how it affects mental health. The constant discomfort can lead to feelings of frustration, isolation, and helplessness. Anxiety about potential flare-ups can keep you from making plans, while depression may settle in as you realize that some hobbies are now off-limits.
I’ve struggled with moments of hopelessness, questioning why my body doesn’t function as it once did. It’s easy to fall into a mental trap where pain becomes your identity, overshadowing the person you are beyond your condition.
Despite the challenges, I have found ways to mitigate the pain and better manage its impact on my mental health. Here are some techniques that have helped me, but please remember, the following may not work for everyone. Everyone is different when it comes to managing pain, and everyone finds different ways to cope.
Establish a Routine: Set daily schedules that incorporate gentle movement, stretching, or physical therapy. Having a routine can restore a sense of control and predictability.
Try to Keep Moving: Every time I go for a walk, it brings me pain and fatigue. For the past year, I haven’t been able to walk even ten minutes to the supermarket without feeling worn out and hurting. And yet, I keep going. It’s so crucial to move your body. Don’t overdo it though, and know your limits. If you don't feel safe walking outside, then walk up and down your stairs (if you have them) a couple of times a day.
Seeking Support: Connecting with others facing similar challenges can be incredibly liberating. Whether through support groups, online forums, or chatting with friends, sharing experiences can provide comfort and understanding. I joined two communities on Reddit and frequently pop over there to share updates and try to motivate and sympathise with others who are struggling with back pain.
Educating Myself: Understanding my condition has empowered me. Knowledge about DDD and herniation allows me to make informed decisions about my health care, treatment options, and lifestyle changes.
Creative Outlets: Exploring hobbies that don’t exacerbate pain like writing, painting, or gentle crafts, as they can be a source of emotional release and joy. I found solace and joy in becoming an AI creator and learning about AI for possible future employment opportunities.
Therapy: Professional support from a therapist or counsellor can provide a safe space for processing emotions and developing coping strategies to address anxiety and depression.
A Journey of Resilience.
Living with degenerative disc disease and disk herniation is undoubtedly a challenge that tests resilience, but it’s essential to remind myself that my experiences and feelings are valid. While pain may be part of my life, I try hard not to allow it to define my entire existence. Each day is a new opportunity to learn, adapt, and find meaning beyond the pain.
As I navigate this journey, I’m hopeful that by sharing my story and insights, I can inspire others who may be facing similar struggles. Remember, you are not alone in this fight. Together, we can look beyond the pain and find a path towards healing and happiness.
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